Yo mommas so old..
she might die soon.
What do you call a mexican driving a plane?
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in...
Get in the car.
Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with Brittney...
Because he’s dead.
How do you get a clown off a swing?
You hit him with an axe.
If life throws you melons..
You might be dyslexic.
Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas...
He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.
What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex...
Well its not going to happen so i dont see the point in giving this a name.
What did the homeless man get for Christmas?
How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change it, and another to hold the ladder so the first man doesnt fall and hurt himself.
Whar do you call a man with no arms and legs water...
I don’t know, but that seems like a highly improbable circumstance.
A horse walked into a bar..
Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation
Three blind mice walk into a pub...
They are all unaware of their surroundings so to derive humor from this would be exploitative.
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.
What does an eagle and a mole have in common?
They both live underground. Apart from the eagle.
So a man walks into a bar...
Except it was a metal bar, like a pole. So he got hurt.
How do you make a plumber cry?
You kill his family.
Is this the Krusty Krab?
NO! It’s Patrick!!!!
What did the boy with no arms and legs get for...
Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with...
follow this daring lady →
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
It wasn’t. Numbers are not sentinent thus incapable of feeling fear.
What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac...
They were my friends.
What's green and has wheels?
Weed, i lied about the wheels.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get...
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Why did Suzie fall out of the swing?
because she had no arms